E.C. With Tommy and Mommy

Gifts for the New E.C. Mommy

2011-07-12T10:46:00.000-07:00

TM attended a lovely baby shower last evening. Due to her present state of gestation, she looked rather eagerly at the gifts being opened by the honored mother. What are the latest colors and styles for the newborn?

There was a common theme amongst the gifts and the bearers of them. Onesies are a hot item. As the woman with the bountiful belly opened package after package containing all varieties of one-piece body suits for babies, the other mothers in the crowd would chime in knowingly with comments like, "I LOVE onesies!" and "You can never have enough of those." And TM used to hold this similar opinion. What has changed?

Well, obviously, it's infant potty training that makes onesies undesirable. The flaps that snap between the legs are difficult to hold out of the way when pottying the baby. The snaps themselves can be difficult to manipulate while holding the infant over the potty place and hurrying to get the nether regions bare. And perhaps most frustrating of all, in the case of a miss, the entire outfit has to come off over the head, which can be a messy proposition if the miss was a poopy!

So, what would be a better gift choice if you should be invited to TM's baby shower in about 8 months? Or the baby shower of another mom who plans to E.C., of course. You might want to consider the following issues. Does the outfit consist of one piece rather than a separate shirt and bottom? Can the shirt be unfastened in front, or does it have to be lifted over the head? Is the shirt sort of longish, so that it can be worn without pants and won't look like a crop-top?

This is TM's favorite type of shirt:

And what, besides shirts that snap up the front make good gifts for infant potty trainers? For starters, socks and leggings. These babies may spend a lot of time without pants, so anything that covers the feet and legs will help keep the little one warm.How about a dozen cloth diapers? I mean pre-folds, not fitted or pocket diapers or anything like that. These should be the high quality ones which are sold on places like e-bay. They should say "DSQ" on the description, which means "diaper service quality". These can used on or under the baby, and they also make for great burp cloths.

Diaper belts (see the post here for a description) and tiny underwear are much appreciated. Cotton blankets and quilts that can be used on a bed or floor under baby are perfect. If the mom intends to use a ring sling or maya wrap, having more than one really comes in handy in case the baby has a miss in the sling.

Other thoughtful gifts could include diaper pails, little potties and stacks of wash cloths. Books and DVDs about E.C. can provide ideas and encouragement to a mom who is having one of those days where she thinks that her baby will peeing on herself until she's 12.

What else? What do you wish you would have received as a gift? What gifts did you receive that were completely incompatible with E.C.?

All By Himself - He Took Himself To The Potty!

2011-03-10T19:41:00.000-08:00

Just a few short moments ago, Tommy yelled at TM from the bathroom, "PEE!"

TM went to the bathroom expecting to find Tommy standing near the toilet with wet undies, which has been the "normal" event for the past couple of weeks. Instead, the underwear was laying on the floor (dry, by the way) and Tommy was seated on the Baby Bjorn Little Potty. As TM entered, Tommy stood up. Lo, and behold, there was pee pee in the pot!

One of his big sisters was using the toilet at the time, and I guess he decided to join her. Earlier in the evening, while TM was using the toilet, Tommy had removed his undies and enthroned himself on the little potty. He also peed on that occasion, which was only the second time he had peed in the Little Potty. His normal potty place is on the big toilet, using the baby seat. But TM assumed that he had gone into the bathroom only because he was following her. (You other mothers know all about this, right? When was the last time you went to the bathroom alone?)

There will be no delusions or expectations that taking himself to the potty will become the new normal. But the fact that he did it this once shows that he is making progress towards toilet independence. And that means a lot. It feels good.

.

Totally Off Topic for the Blog - Breastfeeding Photo

2011-01-13T11:53:00.000-08:00

The topic for this blog is Infant Potty Training, Elimination Communication, Potty Whispering and the like. Because the writings are not so much personal in nature, but topical, TM strives to keep the blog uncluttered by not dumping all of the happenings of her seven children, husband, son-in-law and grandchild right here where people come to read about Tommy going poop.

But every once in a while, something happens that is so important to TM that she can rationalize how it is at least tangentially related to Tommy's E.C. lifestyle. Today is just such an occasion. Enjoy. And have fun coming up with your own explanation, which you may share in the "Comments" section, about how this photo is related to the regular subject of this blog.

Here is a description of the photo: On the right is TM, breastfeeding Tommy. On the left is Tommy's oldest sister, breastfeeding Tommy's nephew. Tommy is 19 months in this picture. His nephew is 4 months.

The E.C. Baby at 20 months

2011-01-12T10:28:00.000-08:00

Tommy is such a big boy now. Yesterday TM heard some rustling in the bathroom and entered to see her "baby" lifting the toilet lid and putting his potty seat into place. "Pee!" he stated, rather matter-of-factly. Although when he says it, it sounds more like "Bee."

TM asked, "Do you need to go potty?"

"Botty!" responded Tommy, patting his underpants.

Actually, he had already gone pee pee, but hey, at least he realized it! After being placed upon the potty seat, he peed some more. "Ganny?" asked Tommy. (That's how it sounds when he says "candy") Yes, yes, his mother started the bad habit of giving him a Skittle for going on the potty. She only gives it to him if he asks, and often he forgets to ask.

So, as you can see, things are going pretty well in the E.C. world of Tommy Gunnar. Some days he only wets in his underpants once or twice. Other days, he never makes it to the potty. TM relies primarily on timing, that is, taking him to the potty every so often . But occasionally Tommy initiates the visits to the potty. Right now he is learning to remove his own underpants so that he can sit on the potty chair all by himself. It has only been in the last couple of weeks that he has shown any interest in that contraption at all. The toilet is his preferred place for relieving himself.

Bowel movements are a completely different story. He doesn't seem to mind leaving a crap in his pants. But he wants someone to clean it up pretty quickly! He still gives no sign at all. Usually he comes to me right after and says "Bee." At this point one wonders if this is just a girl vs. boy thing. The first E.C. baby in this family was a girl, and BMs were the easiest thing. Nearly every single one after she was about 2 months old was caught. The second and third E.C. babies are boys, and they don't give signs about pooping.

When he's on the toilet and has either finished going potty or doesn't have to go, he proclaims, "I done!" From the time he makes that proclamation, there is no point in encouraging further activity. When he says he's done, he IS done.

Pictures coming soon...

The Signal That Couldn't Be Ignored

2010-06-29T14:08:00.000-07:00

Today TM lifted Tommy up onto her lap at his request of "Mah! Mah!"

As soon as he was seated he grabbed his crotch, tugged on his little romper and yelled "Ahhhhhh"

Tommy's Mommy asked, "Do you need to go potty?"

"Paaahhhh" responded the little cutie.

After unsnapping the crotch snaps of the romper and removing Tommy's underpants, TM placed him on the Little Potty. He smiled and sat there for approximately 2 seconds. He dislikes the potty chair and has yet to pee pee in it. "Let's go potty," said TM. Tommy stood up and started toddling down the hallway towards the bathroom. This is the cutest thing ever, and it MUST be captured on video. He was saying something like, "heh! heh! heh!"

When he arrived in the bathroom he patted the toilet lid and shouted, "PAH!"

TM took up her place on the step stool in front of the toilet, lifted the lid, placed the potty seat on top of the toilet seat and hoisted Tommy onto the seat. He immediately began making a grunting noise. He sometimes does this when he pees, perhaps because as soon as he starts grunting, who ever else happens to be in the room will start grunting with him, which is amusing.

Then Tommy peed in the toilet. A catch! Yippee! Right, right, the books say not to make a big deal of it. Try to state very matter-of-factly "You went pee." But hey, around this household, we tend to get excited about things like that, so Tommy will just have to get used to it.

Pee, Pee and More Pee

2010-06-11T12:00:00.000-07:00

As soon as he awoke this morning, Tommy was taken to the toilet for his first morning void. Like so many others, that first one in the morning can take awhile. He peed and peed and peed. Then he made the sign for "all done" and he was taken off the toilet.

At that point, TM needed to do some chores in the laundry room, so Tommy followed her there. Thankfully the flooring in the laundry room is vinyl because Tommy wasn't wearing his undies and during the 5 minutes he was in there he piddled on the floor 5 times! And not just a dribble each time, either.

Obviously he is blessed with a large capacity bladder

Oh, by the way, he didn't give any sign or signal of any sort that was perceivable to TM before he urinated on the floor. He didn't seem bothered by it at all after the first time, which soaked his socks.

TM is reminded of the advice she has been given by every EC book she's read - after a miss, always give them a chance to sit on the potty, because they might not be finished.

A New Development

2010-06-10T12:20:00.001-07:00

Tommy has started doing something very exciting! He is now just over 13 months old and yesterday he walked to the bathroom door (it was closed to keep him from playing in the toilet) and said "pee pee". Actually it was his cute, baby version of "pee pee" which sounded more like "pah".

Today, he did it again. After peeing a tiny bit in his underwear he headed for the bathroom to finish the job.

TM decided to try to get away from diapers altogether and has been contemplating how to accomplish it. The first step has been to switch from using the prefold diapers and diaper belt to using Gerber Training Pants
during the day while at home.

Tommy will need some more pairs of undies because his older brother has put a lot of wear on the ones he has now. Unfortunately, it is impossible to find the 18 month size training pants in stores, so they will have to be ordered from Amazon.

For times away from home and for nighttime, Tommy will be transitioning to All in One Waterproof Training Pants
from the disposable diapers he is using now. These are also made by Gerber and are available on Amazon.

2010-05-25T18:03:00.001-07:00

You may have read the blog entry about Tommy's birthday here. If so, you know he received a new potty chair as a gift. The goal being to keep the old potty chair in the car and have a new potty chair to keep inside the house on a permanent basis.

If you read TM's review of the potty chair, you will know that she wasn't too impressed with it. As a matter of fact, she returned it to Target over the weekend for a full refund. Returning it was simple. Target didn't seem to mind at all.

In the end, it just wasn't usable. It will be replaced with this model
as soon as anyone in the household makes an order from Amazon. After it has been thoroughly tested you will find a review right here. Stayed tuned.

Birth Story of Tommy Gunnar

2010-05-19T11:46:00.000-07:00

This blog is dedicated to a single subject. It was planned like that as a way of reaching out to other parents who are interested in EC, to let them have a glimpse into the life of one family who does it. TM didn't want those other parents, most of whom are complete strangers, to be forced to search for the EC bits amongst the volumes of posts about Tommy's siblings, her trip to the grocery store, her unhappiness with the weather, etc.

However, TM knows that sometimes parents who share views in one area of parenting may share views in other areas. This is likely the case with EC and natural child birth. Actually, natural child birth is something about which TM is very passionate, unlike EC, about which she is merely highly interested.

For the reason stated in the first paragraph, TM has chosen not to post the birth story of Tommy Gunnar here on this blog. You can find a link here, to TM's daughter's account of the event. Or you can navigate directly to the daughter's blog to read it.

You can also see the birth on the net by going here.

Now, for the purpose of this post. TM has another blog where she posts her thoughts that no one would care to read, but she's saving them for a book to be published after her death. Anyway, she has posted over there her own description of the labor and birth of Tommy. Some people like to read birth stories, and if you are one of those people, feel free to read it. But before you go there, be warned that it contains some brief references to intimate relations between TM and Tommy's Papa. They are tasteful and not overly graphic, but they are there.

Also, if stories about home birth, and particularly unassisted home birth, and particularly unassisted home water birth cause you to become violent and foam at the mouth because you believe the ONLY proper place for birth is on dry land in a hospital, then do YOURSELF a favor and don't read Tommy's birth story.

The warning has been sufficient, do NOT come back here and comment on how you were ambushed by the private moments mentioned in the birth story, ok?

The Unassisted Home Water Birth of Tommy Gunnar

Video Review: "Potty Whispering" by Laurie Boucke

2010-05-17T12:37:00.000-07:00

In this post it was noted that Infant Potty Training: A Gentle and Primeval Method Adapted to Modern Living authoress Laurie Boucke had produced a DVD titled Potty Whispering: The Gentle Art of Infant Potty Training. Because TM is a big fan of The Dog Whisperer , Cesar Millan, and has read, enjoyed and gleaned much from Infant Potty Training, she assumed that this new DVD would be a good thing. (to borrow a term from Martha Stewart) She was not disappointed.

Tommy's Mommy shall attempt to describe the video to her readers in a manner that will accomplish two goals. The first is that her readers will gain a general understanding of the format and content of the video. The second goal is for this review to actually aid the reader in making an educated decision about whether purchasing this video is a wise and useful choice for a parent learning to communicate with her infant about elimination.

By the way, TM is not above making a shameless plug here about her activities as an Amazon Associate. If one her readers should elect to purchase the DVD from Amazon and uses the above link to navigate to Amazon, TM would get paid a commission from Amazon. Something like 10% . So far, TM has yet to make one cent from being an Amazon Associate, but she remains hopeful.

One of the first things noticed upon opening the DVD case is that it contains not one but actually two disks. The first disk contains the documentary. The second disk contains additional footage that was apparently shot in producing the documentary, but which had to be edited to usable bits and bites. This disk contains complete interviews with ECing families, doctors, psychologists, etc.

In analyzing the format of Potty Whispering, TM was at first tempted to think that it was horribly organized. Or perhaps not organized at all. But further reflection reminded her that she had very similar opinions about Laurie Boucke's book, Infant Potty Training. What follows is an attempt to get into the mind of Laurie Boucke and explain why the material in both her book and documentary video are indeed organized, even if TM would not have chosen the particular style of organization in sharing this material.

The problem for TM (or maybe it's a strength for TM and a problem for Mrs. Boucke) is that TM is a very logical and linear organizer. Her brain is sort of like a file cabinet where things are filed alphabetically, by category or in ordinal rank (1st, 2nd, 3rd, etc.) In Infant Potty Training and Potty Whispering, the content is sorted by category and the exact same content sometimes appears more than once, under different headings. Boucke does this for the benefit of people who don't want to read an entire book, but rather, want to quickly get information on a particular issue. If TM had written the book, she would have started at the beginning with "What is EC", and then moved on to "Why do it" and then "How to get started" and so on. But Boucke is not trying to give us her own personal story or even a "how to" manual necessarily. Instead she offers a compilation of research, resources and the personal experiences of others who have successfully used infant potty training in a variety of cultures and circumstances.

Here is an example of how TM would sort a big pile of fruit compared to how Boucke might do it. (It's just for fun... don't take this too seriously)

If faced with a huge basket of fruit and the command to "sort it", TM would just line it up from smallest to largest. The order would be completely objective. There would be no question about how each fruit would line up in relation to the other fruit. Boucke, on the other hand, would first arrange the fruit according to color. Then she would rearrange it into groups of fruits with edible seeds and fruits without edible seeds. Then into tree fruits, bush fruits and ground fruits. Then into those that have to be peeled and those that don't. In her world, the same fruit goes in several different piles, depending upon what you are looking for in a fruit. That is how she organized her book and video. Does that make sense?

So, now that format has been covered, the content comes into the spotlight, and here is where Boucke shines. Her expertise on this subject is probably unmatched by anyone else in the world. Not because she might be the most successful mother who ever practiced EC, but because she has done the most work to collect all the known data on the subject and to make it available to the average parent. Through interviews with researchers and her own narration she covers all the anthropological information, including data on how EC is practiced in non-western and primitive cultures. There is a discussion on the history of EC in western culture and how it is different from coercive forms of "early toilet training" as practiced earlier in the last century in the U.S. And, of course, there are the interviews with parents and videos of the cutest babies going pee pee and poo poo on cue.

There are modern experts like doctors and therapists explaining why EC is not the least bit harmful to babies and how the notion that children can't control their sphincters until 18 months or later has never been tested or verified and is a bunch of bunk. As a matter of fact, every day that "fact" is disproved by babies all over the planet, including right here in North America.

The second disk contains some interesting video and interviews. Particularly delightful is the story of Annabelle, a 14 month old girl that is toilet trained. The only thing her mother does is help her pull her panties up and down. The girl signs and verbalizes when she needs to pee or poo, she walks down the hall to the bathroom, does her business... everything. Another family testimony on disk two shows twin 18 month old girls who have two potties in several different rooms in their house so they never have to wait for access.

For those who have read Infant Potty Training, you will be glad to see a couple of the stars from that book, siblings by the names of Sarah and Beau. Not only is there video from when they were babies, but recent interviews with them, many years after they graduated from potty training. It is amusing to watch Sarah, watching herself for the first time as a baby on a TV interview show. She also comments on whether she would choose to practice EC with her own children someday.

There is footage of Boucke doing interviews on television. While TM hates to be critical of someone who has done so much to make the marvelous option of EC knowable to her, it is difficult not to notice that she tends to look quite frumpy on video. Her hair is stringy and unkempt looking. Nearly every woman seeing this will be silently thinking, "Wow. If I knew I was going to be on TV, I would at least comb my hair." This is no joke. It distracts from the beautiful message. Her voice is also boring and monotone. Perhaps she should have hired one of those British guys that narrate PBS nature documentaries. Don't you always come away after watching one of those feeling like a real smarty pants? I think it's the accent.

Another thing you should know is that much of video and photography is old. It was probably filmed with home video quality VHS cam-corders, without the benefit of proper lighting or studio sound. The narrator points this out at the beginning and is unapologetic about it. There is no need to apologize. Obviously she wasn't working with a Hollywood film studio budget and she's been at it for over a decade, maybe as long as two. The work needed to be made in spite of the lack of high quality production. Parents can't wait for someone rich to start from scratch using the latest technologies and a crew of hundreds to fan out all over the world to capture this story.

In spite of these limitations, the scope is far reaching. Experts from Europe, the U.S. and the far east have appearances in the film. The quality of the information presented doesn't suffer in the least for its lack of fancy, splashy presentation.

So, is this a valuable asset to the video library of an EC parent? Absolutely. If you need data to help you make a decision about EC or to defend your choice with well-meaning but nay-saying family and friends, you will find it here. Does your husband want to find out more about EC, but he doesn't have the time or inclination to read a stack of books? Let him watch this video.

TM's favorite thing about Potty Whispering is that nothing conveys the simplicity of EC like a few clips of babies being pottied by their parents. Much like an episode of the Dog Whisperer, where Cesar Millan changes the behavior of what was considered to be an incorrigible dog in about 8 seconds, Potty Whispering undoes years of incorrect thought about the awareness that an infant has about his elimination needs. He DOES know when he has to pee. He CAN communicate with his parents about it. He CAN hold it until he gets to the potty place. He CAN pee and poop on cue.

An EC Uh-oh

2010-05-05T12:25:00.000-07:00

The other day TM took Tommy to go pee pee on the toilet in the master bath. On their way out of the bathroom, TM noticed that her bed needed to be made, so she set Tommy on the floor in order to tend to the job. Tommy quickly crawled away to the living room to investigate the activities of his older siblings.

TM made the bed and then plopped down in front of the computer to check email. Unfortunately, she forgot that Tommy was bare-bottomed.

A few minutes later, Tommy came crawling down the hall. Much to TM's horror, she saw that he had poop on his feet. And his legs. And his hands. He was grinning from ear to ear.

This is the stuff of EC nightmares. More than once TM has been asked, "What? You just let your baby poop and pee all over the house?" To which she would always respond, "Of course not!" Hmmmph.

While it is true that one of TM's goals is that her babies won't be wearing their wastes, it is also a goal that they put them in an appropriate receptacle - not just drop them wherever they might fall! In this case, they fell on the carpet, and Tommy crawled through. Then he decided to pull himself up to the piano and play a few notes. Yuck!

Has it been mentioned that the carpet in Tommy's household is a nice poopy brown color? Now TM had to get on her hands and knees and retrace Tommy's path, trying to see poop that was camouflaged in the rug. Mostly she had to follow her nose.

As embarrassing as that is to share, be assured that this is the first time this has happened to TM, and Tommy is her 3rd ECing baby.

Thankfully, there are no pictures to go with this post.

Tommy's Birthday

2010-05-03T08:55:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked the one-year anniversary of Tommy's birth. The family celebrated with cake, ice cream and gifts, in the traditional American way. To the right you can see Tommy having his first experience with cake. Actually, he probably has had a bit of cake already, handed to him by well-meaning relatives, but mostly TM has endeavored to keep sweets out of his hands. Instead he has been weaned on less sweet or downright sour stuff like plain yogurt, kefir and smashed veggies. Tommy also likes meat; steak and chicken being two of his favorites, but I digress.

The main point of this entry is a critical review of one of his birthday gifts, a potty chair, and a general update/review of the last 12 months of ECing with Tommy and Mommy.

In looking back over the past year, TM would have to say that ECing has been a great success. It has gone in phases and stages. Just when TM thinks she has Tommy all figured out, things change once again. For a while, Mommy was catching all the poopies. But then Tommy began to venture further away from Mommy and many signs were missed, so the poopy ended up in the diaper, or partly in the diaper with the rest in the toilet. But missing some poops, or even all of them, does not mean failure in EC. Infant potty training is about communicating. It's about listening to a child who is signaling a need to pee pee or poop and about helping the child to do the business in some place other than his clothing. It's about hygiene, helping a baby to stay clean and dry, free from odor and rashes.

As attempts at communication were fostered, more hand signs were added to Tommy's vocabulary. He now has signs for "potty", "milk," "eat" and "done". Right now TM is introducing more hand signs as Tommy seems to be grasping them very quickly. The best part about hand signs is that they allow Tommy to "speak" with clarity so Mommy doesn't have to work so hard to understand him.

As of last week, Tommy is a walker. Now he can move farther and faster than ever before and catching a pee or poop means that Mommy has to keep a sharp eye on him. His main signal that he has to go is just the simple act of searching out Mommy. If TM is in the bedroom and Tommy is in the living room, the sounds of Tommy crawling down the hallway should be assumed to be an announcement. Unfortunately, TM often forgets that this means something, instead just thinking about how cute he looks when they make eye contact. If Tommy doesn't get to Mommy before pottying in the diaper, he always goes to her immediately afterward for a change.

TM is hoping that Tommy, now that he can walk, will begin to take himself to the potty place, or at least move towards it, as a signal that he needs to eliminate. To make this easier on everybody, Mommy thought it would be best to have a potty place in the living room. As seen here, Tommy and his older siblings have a potty chair that they keep in the car. TM is reluctant to bring that potty into the house out of fear that it will be forgotten at home when it is needed in the car. So, in honor of the birthday boy, a new potty was purchased.

Here is Tommy sitting on his new potty chair making the sign for "all done". (Actually, it looks like he is making the sign for "I'll shoot you if don't get me off this potty" - Papa would be proud)

The potty was purchased at Target, because that is where the Bebe Jou potty was purchased and TM was hoping to score another one of those. Unfortunately, Target did not have those or any thing even closely resembling them. There were potties of every color, with every kind of useless gadget, including potties that flush and potties that play music. But every version suffered from the same flaw - they were all designed to look like toilets. You know the type, a wide bowl-type thing sitting on a narrow base.

Are the designers of potty seats retarded? I'm serious. The only reason that we can sit on a toilet with even the tiniest degree of safety is that a toilet is BOLTED to the floor! Who makes a chair that is narrower on the bottom than at the top? Have any of these useless designers ever seen a child attempt to sit on one of their creations? They tip and topple. If the child does manage to sit and do his business, in the act of standing up he tips the chair and now we have urine all over the place! Honestly, why do parents put up with this stuff?

Have you ever seen an old time potty chair? It is basically a wooden chair with a hole cut for a receptacle. Perfect. And safe. Too bad Tommy doesn't have access to one of those.

For the record, this potty is made by a company called, ironically, Safety 1st! Well, Safety 1st is going to be getting an email from Tommy's Mommy about the stupid design of this potty seat.

Target had one model of potty seat made by Baby Bjorn, but it wasn't the Little Potty. It looked more like a throne and cost twice as much as the fancy, 4 function one that TM purchased. Tommy's new chair can be used on the toilet seat and when not being used as a potty chair, doubles as a step-stool.

However, the new potty has one redeeming feature. The removable bowl/receptacle thingy inside of the potty works great as a potty bowl for an infant who is being pottied on the lap. Here is what it looks like:

As much as advertising this badly designed potty seat brings pain, the following link is offered so you can see all the amazing functions of this chair. *eyes rolling* It's such a piece of junk, even Target doesn't have it on their website.

Safety 1st Potty 'n Step Stool

So, happy 1st birthday, Tommy!

Traveling With the E.C. Baby

2010-02-16T12:31:00.001-08:00

Recently Tommy's parents and family took a couple of road trips which prompted TM to want to share some tips with other E.C. families about traveling. She can hear someone asking, "Sure, ECing is fine for when you are at home, but what about when you are away?"

When E.C.ing Tommy's older sister, the family took a trip of over 2000 miles, one way, when she was just 14 months old. So Tommy isn't the first baby in the family for whom potty considerations were a priority on vacation. The trips with Tommy were handled in much the same way as the trip with his older sister.

As with all of infant potty training, the key is being relaxed. There are bound to be misses and one needs to plan ahead of time not to get frustrated or angry, but to remember that these are babies and wet panties are not a cataclysm. Also, there is no reason to feel guilt for using diapers. While it is TM's opinion that the long term, constant wearing of diapers is unhealthy, she doesn't believe that a few hours or even a couple of days of constant use is particularly dangerous.

The biggest problem with going diaperless in the car is protecting the padding on the child restraint seat. Unfortunately, this state (and probably yours, too) has draconian laws mandating that parents keep their children restrained in "approved" safety seats at all times. NOTICE: Rant to follow in 3... 2... 1....

If TM were to restrain Tommy in the self same child seat, in our home, for 20 hours straight, and the government nanny state found out about it, there is no doubt that TM would likely have her infant removed from her family due to "abuse". However, if the said infant is buckled into the "abusive" devise for 20 hours straight while riding in a vehicle, it is somehow not "abuse" at all... but proof of loving care. END of rant.

So, while driving down the highway, if Tommy needs to pee pee, it would be a violation of the law for TM or one of Tommy's older siblings to remove him from his restraint and hold him over a receptacle to catch the pee. Instead, in order to lawfully catch the pee pee, Tommy's Papa would have to bring the vehicle to a stop. Since Tommy goes pee pee about every 20 minutes when he is awake, this is not really an option for a long car trip. Therefore TM is resigned to Tommy going pee pee in the seat.

Therefore, the question is, what to use to catch the pee pee? For the most part, Tommy wears a disposable diaper in the car seat. But another option is to leave him diaperless and put a diaper or waterproof pad under Tommy and change that out when it gets wet. At every stop Tommy is removed from his seat and offered the opportunity to potty, either in the little potty chair, or over a toilet or sink.

Which brings up the question, what type of potty is good for travel? TM has been very pleased with her purchase of a Bebe Jou Potty from Target. It looks like this:

It is unknown if Target still sells them, as they are now carrying, at least on their website, the very popular BABYBJÖRN Little Potty. Another option for babies that can sit up is the toddler toilet seat that sets on top of a regular toilet seat. The First Years Soft Trainer Seat
Since Tommy uses this type of seat at home, TM makes sure to pack it along when traveling. It isn't used so much during the actual travel, but at the destination.

Our Bebe Jou fits very neatly under the seat of the family van and the van never leaves home without it. Even the older children who are completely toilet independent use it when a real toilet is too far. It also serves nicely for those ladies who wouldn't dare put their heiny close to the ground in an emergency, but can squat over the little potty with ease.

Here you can see how the small potty fits under the middle seat and our 4 year old poses on the front passenger seat pretending to use the potty. Even in a crowded parking lot, this method provides complete modesty for the little lady.

After the potty has been used, the contents can be dumped under a bush, or on a rainy Oregon day, the 2 or 3 tablespoons of urine can just be dumped in the parking lot.

Upon arriving at your final destination, you have to decide if you want to just diaper for the duration or attempt to EC in a strange environment with potentially hostile witnesses, such as strangers, grandparents and distant relatives. For the most part, TM prefers to EC as much as possible without sweating the situations where it might be too cumbersome. Obviously Tommy's comfort is a high priority and forcing him to wear his products of elimination exclusively for the benefit of grown ups is sort of selfish.

During the weekend trip to Idaho, Tommy's family was set up in a nice hotel. With two rooms and plenty of space to spread out, it would have been easy enough to practice EC in the same manner as at home. But because TM didn't want to pack a bunch of cloth diapers (Tommy's normal attire, worn with a diaper belt as seen here ) she elected to keep him in disposables while taking him frequently to the potty.

The next weekend, however, Tommy and his Mommy and Papa left for a week long business trip to fabulous Las Vegas, and TM had no intention of keeping Tommy in diapers for that length of time. So, she stayed up until late into the night the evening before the trip in order to sew up 10 pairs of split crotch pants. Unlike cloth diapers, the pants dry easily after being rinsed out in the hotel sink. In the hotel room, Tommy was diaper free, wearing only the split crotch pants. For excursions out of the hotel, he was diapered. Here is the view from our 12th floor hotel room.

New Milestone - Poop in the Pot

2009-12-31T09:48:00.000-08:00

Just a few days shy of the 8 month anniversary of his birth, and Tommy is finally sitting up well enough to be put on the toilet. Obviously he can't just prop himself up on a regular toilet seat, as his tiny heiny would slip right through the hole. Instead, a toddler toilet seat is first placed upon the throne to facilitate the safety of baby.

So yesterday was his first foray in pottying on the toilet. Things went well. Very well.

TM placed the little seat on the big seat, then set Tommy on top of that. In placing a baby, particularly a boy, on the seat, it is important to remember to spread his legs. This spreading helps him to maintain his balance and it allows ample room for the penis to aim downward. If his legs are together, the penis tends to either be squeezed between the legs or, worse yet, sit on top of them, so when the tinkle begins the pee pee will run all over the legs or spray in TM's face. An alternate route would be across the thighs to the knee, then dripping down the shins to the floor. Anyway, just remember to spread the legs and avoid all the issues.

The cues were given to Tommy (verbal and visual, psssssssssss and the hand sign). Tommy seemed amused by this new potty position and in a few short moments he entertained himself further by depositing a BM in the pot. The BM was accompanied by several short burst of flatulence which echoed wildly underneath him, causing him to burst out in laughter. Then he followed that with a pee pee.

Of course, TM was very excited and pleased, and because her hands were free she clapped. This made Tommy laugh again, as it was a new experience. Usually when he potties, even though TM is pleased, she is unable to do anything so funny as clapping because she is holding Tommy with both hands.

This morning's pottying on the toilet was captured by digital camera and is herewith included for your enjoyment and edification.

Notice that his legs are apart and he is making the potty sign with his right hand.

At times like this, ECing is just plain fun!

NO MISSES!

2009-12-18T19:51:00.000-08:00

You heard (read) that right, we had not one single miss today. That's an EC first for TM, with Tommy or any other 7 month old.

I need to get busy sewing the rest of those pants!

We Keep Rolling Along

2009-12-14T15:38:00.000-08:00

One of TM's greatest frustrations is that so much of her EC with Tommy takes place with him in her arms and without witnesses. Of course, it is great that he is in her arms, it is wonderful fun, but TM is the only one getting to see it and she can't take pictures while holding the baby.

We caught two poopies today. It really seems as if Tommy waits until he's at the potty place to make a poopy. It's been a while since he did it in his diaper. That makes laundry so much easier, and really is reason enough to EC.

Tommy is now making the hand sign for "potty" (well, his own version of it) when I get him in the potty position. He also blows raspberries as his version of making the cue "psssssssss". TM will try to get a video of these things, as they need to be documented, but, as noted above, she is usually alone with Tommy and holding him with both hands when this occurs.

Two pairs of split crotch pants have been made and there will be more to follow. Hopefully the transition will be made away from diapers and over to pants. There will be another post and pictures of the split crotch pants coming soon.

For Those Who Want To Learn More...

2009-12-05T15:42:00.000-08:00

Here is a link to an article by Laurie Boucke, (pronounced Boo-Kay) author of Infant Potty Training.

Tommy and Mommy can't wait to see her DVD Potty Whispering!

Infant Laryngitis

2009-11-24T14:58:00.000-08:00

Tommy has a cold. This cold has resulted in Tommy losing his voice. Because he uses his voice mostly for crying (Tommy cries A LOT!), his illness has acted as a somewhat of a vacation for his family from listening to his screams.

If we didn't feel so badly for him it would be difficult not to laugh at poor Tommy, mouth agape, clearly registering his complaint, but without sound.

This is one baby that has no reason to be discontent. Yet it is so. He is breastfed, coddled by family members and doesn't have to wear his own products of elimination. Perfect life, no? Somehow, he just doesn't think so.

The Intact Baby Boy

2009-11-24T14:17:00.000-08:00

Those of you who practice EC know that you see things that other parents never see. Things like spotting and the blast force of a breast milk poopy. For those with boys, what you see while standing at the sink looking down at his penis while he makes a pee pee can be surprising and perhaps scary if you don't know what to expect.

First, an anatomy lesson. The penis of a baby boy has a foreskin. If your boy does not have a foreskin, then it was removed surgically. This is not a separate or superfluous part, it is an integral part of the penis itself. Unlike the eyelid, which is not a part of or attached to, the eye, even though it plays a roll in covering the eye and holding it in its proper place, the foreskin cannot be seen as a separate organ or bit of tissue from the penis. The foreskin is not near the penis or attached to the penis, it is PART of the penis.

A foreskin is usually adhered, at birth, to its penis. Unlike the foreskin of an adult male which is fully retractable, an infant's foreskin does not retract but remains over the glans of the penis. Most foreskins extend beyond the glans of the flaccid penis and usually beyond the glans of the erect penis, as well, at least in babies.

Because the foreskin is adhered to the glans (also called the "head" of the penis), do NOT attempt to pull it back to uncover the glans, no matter what some ignorant doctor or mother-in-law suggests! Pulling on the foreskin before it is ready to retract can cause ripping and scarring on the glans. This will be painful for the baby, could result in infection, scarring and unnatural adhesions requiring surgery or circumcision, or could cause phimosis, an emergency condition whereby the foreskin gets stuck in the retracted position.

So, there you are, holding your little man in the Potty Position, looking over his shoulder, down to his penis. What do you see? You will probably notice that the penis always tends to point or drape to a particular side. Tommy's Papa told me this is sometimes called "dress", as in, "He dresses to the right." This is normal. No need to attempt to make it hang straight.

As he starts to pee you will notice that before any urine comes out the area in front of the glans plumps up as the foreskin fills. Then the urine shoots out of the end of the foreskin. The opening in the foreskin my be very tiny in newborns. That will cause the stream of urine to be thin and high pressure. Do not be frightened by this. It is completely normal. You don't need to rush him to the doctor to get the opening in the foreskin enlarged. A tiny opening in the foreskin does not mean that the baby's meatus, the opening in the tip of the penis which you can't see because it is under the foreskin, is small or restricted.

Through the natural processes of urination, erections and general handling, the adherence of the foreskin to the glans of the penis will lessen over time until eventually the foreskin will be able to retract completely off of the glans onto the shaft. There is no set amount of time in which this must occur. Studies in Scandinavian countries have shown that it can take up to 18 years in some men. On average it occurs at a much younger age. Don't be surprised if you never know when it occurs, because you aren't likely to see much of your son's penis after he is completely toilet independent.

The first signs of the lessening of the grip of the foreskin to the glans is an increasing size of the opening in the end of the foreskin through which the urine flows. You will notice this as the disappearance of the bulging that used to occur at the tip of the penis during urination. When the size of the opening in the foreskin matches the size of the opening in the penis (the meatus), or is very close in size, the urine doesn't build up in the foreskin before squirting out. This will result in a lower pressure urination, but it will still be pretty forceful.

Another thing you might notice is that the pee pee tends to always shoot in the same direction (slightly left, right, upward or downward) regardless of the way the penis hangs. This probably has to do with the location of the opening in the foreskin in relation to the meatus. If it tends to shoot upwards, you have to adjust your potty position accordingly in order to avoid time consuming clean ups.

TM has no clue how pottying looks with a circumcised baby. Feel free to post your own experiences in the comments if you think they will be edifying to a first-timer.

Some Days Are Not So Pleasant

2009-11-16T16:49:00.000-08:00

Today Tommy wasn't too interested in the potty. The nap was elusive. He was put down in the usual manner several times, but he was never able to sleep for more than about 20 or 30 minutes. Normally he sleeps at least an hour.

TM managed one Catch in the sink, with some coaxing. Tommy was arching his back and fussing. Normally an arched back means he doesn't need to go and so the attempt is abandoned, but TM knew he did need to pee pee, so she insisted he sit still (well, sit in the Potty Position) and go. After about a minute, he tinkled and returned merrily to his play. Carried in TM's arms, of course.

Where's the Dimple?

2009-11-14T13:38:00.000-08:00

On the baby's knuckle,
On the baby's knee;
Where will the baby's dimple be?

Baby's cheek or baby's chin;
Seems to me it would be a sin;

If it's always covered with a safety pin!

Oh, where will the dimple be?

author unknown

The above is a song that my mother sings to her grandchildren when they are bouncing on her knee. I wish I had an audio file of her singing it.

Going Potty Here and There

2009-11-14T12:10:00.000-08:00

When Tommy woke this morning he was taken to the potty first thing. However, big sister was using the sink so TM took Tommy to the toilet instead. Standing in front of the pot, facing it in the manner that a man would do in order to urinate, she held Tommy in the potty position over the toilet. The potty position simply means that Tommy is sitting in TM's hands with his back against her tummy or chest. Her hands are gripping Tommy under the thighs.

He reclines slightly and his legs are held apart and bent at the hips. Almost as if he was squatting in a semi-horizontal pose. The legs have to be held apart in this manner to prevent his pee pee from spraying his feet.

TM was not able to use this standing position with the last two EC babies. Apparently all of that T-Tapping is paying off! The usual manner of using the toilet as a potty place had TM sitting on a step stool in front of the toilet. The step stool is also handy for when the ECing baby starts sitting on the mini-seat that attaches to the toilet seat. Mommy needs to be right there to prevent the baby from taking a nasty fall.

So, Tommy's Mommy scores a Catch in the toilet right off the bat!

Tommy is then placed in the sling so TM can make breakfast. About 30 minutes later, it is decided that it might be time for Tommy to tinkle again. The only signal TM gets is a slight warm feeling on her hip where Tommy sits in the sling. Rather than trotting all the way to the bathroom while she is watching the oatmeal cook, she decides to use the big red potty bowl.

The bowl is placed on a nearby table (ok, ok, it's the dining room table) and Tommy is lifted out of the sling and his diaper is untucked from the the Diaper Belt in front. Tommy is held in the Potty Position and very quickly he starts a stream. TM is observant to make sure the stream lands directly in the center of the bowl. YES! Another catch!

The tricky thing about using bowls and holding the baby over them instead of tucking the bum in them is that baby may decide to poop while he is peeing. If he is being held in such a way that the stream of urine is landing in the center of the bowl, the poopy may miss the bowl entirely and you will have a bit of a mess. This is why TM so much prefers the bathroom sink for pottying. It is large enough that the baby's bottom can be moved over the sink without worrying that he will pee completely over it. And even if he does, the pee will just hit the mirror or the counter and can be easily cleaned.

I'm sorry this blog has such a lack of useful photos. The problem, of course, is that TM is the one holding Tommy when he potties, and she can't simultaneously operate the camera.

First Foods

2009-11-13T15:07:00.000-08:00

When considering starting solid foods, the EC mommy has an additional issue with which to deal. Tommy's primary potty place is the sink. Breast milk poopy that is watery is very easy to wash down the sink drain.

Once solids are introduced, the poop begins to not only take on an odor, but to become solid as well. The beginning of solid bowel movements usually means the beginning of transitioning to the toilet or potty chair.

That being said, today Tommy had his first solid food. (Actually, he had about 1/4 t. of plain, home made yogurt last week) TM took one thin slice of banana and smashed it on a plate. It looked like less than a teaspoon of mashed banana. Tommy opened his mouth and easily took the spoon with just a tad of banana on the tip. He ate about 3 of these bites.

Now TM waits and watches to see what passes...

Baby, It's C-C-Cooooold Outside! Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

2009-11-12T17:29:00.000-08:00

ECing lends itself to nekkid babies in the same way that many parents like to toilet train their toddlers during the summer. The point being that if baby wets his clothing, there is less of it to change and launder. But nekkid babies can be a problem in the winter.

The books about ECing talk about all of the cultures where infant potty training is practiced, and they are primarily in warm climates. The exception is China. Those babies seem to be fully clothed rather than just wearing a string around the waist.

In the United States we have the advantage of climate controlled homes. Even when it is cold outside we can crank up the heat and be toasty warm. This permits us to have our EC babies wearing only t-shirts, socks and diaper belt ensembles, which is the look frequently sported by Tommy.

There may be times, however, when even an American doesn't want to keep her home warm enough for running around naked. Perhaps she heats with wood and on days that are slightly cold, starting a fire will only result in a house that is uncomfortably warm and she would rather just bundle herself and the kids in more clothing.

While TM does intend to make some of those cute Chinese style split pants seen HERE, in the meantime she whipped up some leggings to keep Tommy's legs warm.

To make your own EC leg warmers, find a pair of socks you don't want. It is fine if they have holes in the toes or heels. As a matter of fact, that makes it even better since you will be cutting off that part of the sock.

TM chose a pair of her own knee socks and a pair of crew socks. Stop coveting TM's Ginghers! You can buy your own using one of those coupons for Jo-Ann's where you get 50% off one item. Sorry for the rabbit trail...

Simply cut the foot off of the sock.

Now you have a pair of leg warmers that cost you nothing and took you about 20 seconds to make. You probably spent more time than that just looking for some scissors.

See how warm Tommy looks now? This crew sock is ribbed so it clings to his leg. For an even tighter fit, use a child's sized sock.

Here Tommy is modeling one of each type of sock. The knee sock only has ribbing at the top so it fits and hangs more like a pant leg.

If you have absolutely no skills and you need a pair of these leggings, simply mail a pair of old socks to TM along with $10 for shipping. She will put her Ginghers to work on your socks and your EC baby will be warm in a jiffy!

Of course, you can spend more and buy spiffy brand new ones HERE.

The main thing is to find a way to keep baby's legs warm on those cold days.

Breastfeeding Oversupply Syndrome

2009-11-10T12:57:00.000-08:00

Yes, the title is serious. There is actually a syndrome or collection of symptoms related to having an oversupply of breast milk! Isn't that amazing?

Women that EC tend to also breast feed their babies. The connection has to do with how these women want to do what is best and most healthy for their babies and to connect with them on deep levels. Very earthy. Very crunchy. (although we now know that granola isn't the health food we were all led to believe - but I digress) An interesting aspect of this connection is that EC mommies get to see the milk going in AND coming out. This makes them pretty aware when something is out-of-sorts.

So, TM is noticing that Tommy is not only fussy, crying all the time, and spitting up excessively, she also notices that his poopy is foamy. It looks like it came straight out of a Pampered Chef suds pump. Instead of shooting into the sink with great force, it sort of puffs and bubbles its way from Tommy's bottom to the sink and then to the drain. It is also a bit more greenish than its usual yellow color.

Those of you who use diapers all the time rarely get the opportunity to analyze poopy to this depth. After all, by the time you see the poopy, it has had ample opportunity to soak into the material of the diaper whether that be paper or cloth. So really foamy poopy has been a sight that has alluded you. Alas and alack.

Back to the subject at hand...

TM was a bit concerned about this and she turned to the breastfeeding experts, other women who nurse their babies. Thankfully, one of these experienced moms has this great interview on her website Breastfeeding Mother-To-Mother. Go to this link, listen to the interview and learn more than you ever thought possible about Breast Feeding Over Supply Syndrome. While you are there, read the rest of the stuff on the site. Order her breastfeeding video as well. I've seen it and it is outstanding. You can also get it HERE

TM's summary of the issue is this: your breasts can make more milk than they really need to. If that happens, then baby can end up consuming too much foremilk, resulting in a gassy baby with foamy poop.

To solve the problem, Tommy's feeding was changed from "switch feeding" to "block feeding". Switch feeding means feeding the baby on one breast at each feeding then switching to the other breast at the next feeding. The advantage to this system is that a mommy merely has to tap each breast before a feeding to see which one is the fullest and thus the ONE for that nursing episode. A mommy doesn't have to try to remember which breast was used first at the last feeding or any of that complicated stuff.

Block feeding means using only one breast for a specified number of hours, regardless of how often baby nurses. For example, left breast for four hours, then right breast for four hours. This allows each breast to be fully drained of the fatty hind milk (terribly simplistic terminology and explanation as it would take a full discussion for the subjects of "draining" a breast and "hind milk") and be able to have a break of X number of hours between uses, which will stop the over stimulation of the breast and hopefully reduce milk production.

There are countless articles out there about how to increase the milk supply, but very few about how to decrease the milk supply. This is probably because the danger of a low supply is a more serious and possibly life threatening problem. Also, there may just be more women with low supply than with over supply. Until seeing this interview, TM didn't even know the latter issue was a problem. You can imagine her surprise when the "problem" turned out to be HERS!

Tommy is baby number 7 in his family. His mother is not inexperienced with breast feeding. But switch feeding had always been very convenient and she never had any reason to try something different until she saw the foamy poops and dealt with the fussy baby. When first changing to Block Feeding, TM was using four hour blocks. This was not good because it was hard to remember. If the left breast was used from 12 to 4 a.m., it would end up being the right breast from 12 to 4 p.m., which was confusing. After only 2 days of that, TM assigned the block times currently being used and the problems associated with over supply went away.

Now Tommy gets access to the right breast for 6 hours, from 12 to 6 and the left breast from 6 to 12.

Within two weeks of implementing this system the foamy poops stopped and TM noticed a definite reduction in the fullness of the breasts. Naturally the milk supply was watched closely to make sure that a more drastic reduction did not occur. But the supply seemed to level off, exactly matching the demand.

For more info on Breast Feeding Oversupply Syndrome, or to get answers for other breast feeding issues, be sure to visit the link above.

Spotting

2009-11-04T15:29:00.000-08:00

Tommy is the third baby this Mommy has worked with to establish Elimination Communication. Two out of those three babies experienced what TM calls "spotting".

As the name implies, spotting means that something leaves a spot. In this case, it means that a spot of poopy is left in the diaper. The spots are small, ranging in size between that of a dime and a quarter. (My apologies to all non-United States readers who won't be able to gauge the size of the spots being described based upon American coinage)

The problem of spotting is easy to manage with the Diaper Belt system described in the previous post. You may recall that the prefold cloth diaper is folded into thirds then placed between Tommy's legs; the diaper being held in place by mean of tucking it into/under the Diaper Belt in front and back. Upon arriving at the potty place, such as the bathroom sink, the diaper is untucked from the front of the Diaper Belt and removed from between Tommy's legs. It remains tucked in the back to keep it from falling off all the way - because we are assuming the diaper is still DRY and will not need to be removed.

At this point, if "spotting" is discovered, it is dealt with thusly: rather than just removing the diaper and putting it in the diaper pail, it is removed and re-folded so that the spot is contained within the folds rather than up against Tommy's skin or on the outside where it may contact TM's clothing. Ick.

In this manner, the diaper with the spot can continue to be used until it gets wet or gets another spot. This saves on laundry. Isn't that clever?

By now you be wondering, why does the spotting happen? I have my own mini-theory. It goes like this: the poopy is sort of watery in a young baby, and the liquid part of the poopy just manages to leak out of the anal sphincter. You will be glad to know that both of my spotters outgrew the problem by 3 or 4 months. And, as my second EC baby proved, the problem is not universal.

The big question TM had upon encountering the problem was, "Why isn't this problem addressed in the expensive books purchased on this subject?" The title of one of these books is Diaper Free. As the name implies, the author actually had her baby go bare bottomed. Either she didn't have a spotter, or she has an even greater tolerance for poopy than even she admits in the book. Even with leather furniture and no carpet, no one wants dots of poop all over their clothing and home. TM is not overly squeamish about poopy, but this phenomenon nearly caused her to give up ECing, thinking EC baby #1 had a physical anomaly.

Anyway, take heart if you have a spotter. The baby will likely out grow the spotting and in the meantime, you can use diapers to catch the mess.

The Diaper Belt

2009-11-03T11:24:00.000-08:00

Today I want to do "Show And Tell." I will both show you a Diaper Belt and tell you how it is used. My oldest daughter must be credited here, as she is the one who created the Diaper Belts I use. While I could make them myself, she was kind enough to do it for me, saving me the time and effort.

A Diaper Belt is nothing more than a piece of flannel, sewn as a casing with a bit of elastic threaded through it. It looks something like those little elastic headbands you see that are made for bald baby girls.

Here is a photo of Tommy wearing his diaper belt.

To use it for ECing, I simply put the Diaper Belt around his waist, take a prefolded cloth diaper folded in thirds and tuck into the Belt in front and back. When pottying the baby, I merely have to untuck the diaper from the belt in front and flip it out of the way.

Accountability Overcomes Sloth

2009-05-11T12:13:00.000-07:00

Since starting this blog, TM feels some responsibility to give the readers something new. Being naturally slothful, she might be tempted to just let Tommy pee in his diaper instead of offering him the pot, but just knowing there are readers encourages her to meet his real need, which is to eliminate away from his own body.

So, this morning, right after his first nursing, she held him over the red potty bowl, gave the cue "psssssssssss. Go pee-pee". And a stream ensued! Not only that, but it was immediately followed by a blast of poopy.

Speaking of blasting poopy - this next section will be graphic and probably of interest only to mothers. But then again, most mothers are already familiar with baby poop, so maybe it will be of interest to those who are less familiar. Not knowing who actually reads this, TM will just assume the minimum of knowledge and explain things "from scratch" so to speak.

Human babies who drink human milk exclusively have feces which is very different from the adult variety. It is even very different from the older baby variety. It has the color and consistancy of yellow mustard. More liquid than solid, peppered with seed-like elements. Many first time moms are surprised to see this, as they may have mostly encountered, during their babysitting years, the stinky blobs of older children who have been eating solid food.

But more interesting for first time ECing moms is the surprise they get at seeing how forcefully these movements pass from the tiny baby bottom! With TM's older children, she was familiar with the sounds of these explosive poopies, but until she held the little one over the sink and watched as the stuff flew out she had no idea of the power and speed with which they pass.

Many of the readers who are moms are familiar with this scenario: You hear the baby poop. You know by the sound that it was a "big one". You turn the baby over and see that the poopy has been forced out of the back of the diaper through the leg openings as well as up the back. Baby's entire shirt back is soaked with it and it exited the shirt via the neck opening. This is known as the "blow out." Moms every where pack their diaper bags in anticipation of just such an event. Usually both mom and baby need a bath after this.

Well, with EC, an attentive mom and some quick action, the above scene can be completely avoided, but take care to aim the baby's bottom properly, or that type of poopy will completely miss the sink and land on the counter!

Some are probably saying, "The sink! Oh! That is so GROSS! You let your baby poop in the sink?" But you must understand, this poop is mostly liquid, if not completely liquid. With a bit of running water it goes right down the drain and into the septic tank, the same destination as the stuff that goes into the toilet. TM also keeps a spray bottle of bleach water nearby and sprays the sink after using it to catch bm's.

Not everyone uses the sink, but TM finds it handy. When the stuff is caught in the big red potty bowl, it is rinsed and dumped into the toilet.

When baby poops directly into the sink or other receptacle, there is little or nothing on baby that needs to be cleaned or wiped. That is one of the benefits to the force of the blast. Baby's bottom stays clean and dry. There is never an issue of diaper rash. That is one of TM's favorite things about ECing. The clean baby.

In between starting and finishing this post, TM managed to catch two more pees and a poop. All the books on this subject say that best time to try catching a pee (if using timing and not watching or waiting for a signal from baby) is right after a nap or right after nursing. When Tommy woke up from one of his little naps, Mommy held him over the bowl. He didn't go and he seemed pretty hungry, so Mommy held his bottom over the bowl while she nursed him. This was one of those few times when he didn't poop while nursing. But as soon as Tommy finished nursing, Mommy held his bottom in the bowl with his back resting on her chest, and she gave the cue, "Psssssssssssss. Go pee-pee". And he did!

Then, it was time for Tommy to nurse on the other side. Mommy left his bottom bare and just slid a cloth diaper underneath him. After a minute or two Mommy heard the sound of a bm and quickly switched the diaper for the red bowl. She got 1/2 a catch as more poopy and pee pee landed in the bowl.

Fun, fun, fun.

Tommy and Mommy had one more catch before bed time. All in all it was a good day. Hopefully this blogger will be returning soon with a post containing pictures of some of the equipment we use for ECing. Surely everyone wants to see the big red potty bowl?

Post # 1 - Clever Title, eh?

2009-05-09T17:20:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Tommy was 6 days old. Mommy "caught" (see definitions below) her first pee!

After the catch, Mommy thought it would be good to keep a journal of the "EC" (see definitions below) process with Tommy, since she can remember so little of the way it went with the last two kiddos. Then she thought, "why not do it on-line so that others can learn and be encouraged?"

There are probably other moms doing an EC blog, so what makes Tommy's Mommy (referred to hereinafter as "TM") uniquely qualified to share? Nothing really. But this will be the third ECing baby for TM. Since most American families have only 1.8 children (or something like that) and since very few families choose to use EC, that means there are very, very few moms with as much experience in EC as TM.

Tommy has a big sister who is now over 3 years old and is pretty much completely independent with toileting herself. She needs help wiping every now and then. Tommy has a big brother who is not yet 2, and he is NOT toilet independent, but he doesn't wear diapers and he goes through most days staying pretty dry and clean.

For the uninitiated, Mommy will give a brief explanation of UC, then some vocabulary. After that, the posts will consist of our progress, little vignents of how EC is working for Tommy and Mommy. I hope to include what is sadly missing from TM's former EC experiences, cute photos!

Elimination Communication is a term we use to describe how a person, primarily a mother, learns to communicate with her baby about his elimination (pee and poop), to recognize when he has to go and to train him to go on cue. One of the results is that the baby doesn't spend the first two or three years of his life sitting in his own filth. Even more importanly, he is not taught that his clothing is the appropriate place for elimination for two years, then abruptly forced to change all that he has learned when one day, suddenly, his clothing becomes the absolutely wrongest place for elimination. There is a consistency from birth that says "there are appropriate places to eliminate and, whenever possible, your clothing is NOT one of those places"

Definitions:

EC - Elimination Communication. Also called Elimination Timing, Infant Potty Training, Diaper Free and Trickle Treat. As a verb: "We are ECing"

TM - Tommy's Mommy, blog author

Catch - this is the term used when TM recognizes that Tommy has to eliminate and she is able to hold him over a receptacle where the waste lands. Usually a bowl or the bathroom sink at first, then later, the toilet. Also used for "catching" are potty chairs, grass, cloth diapers, the gutter, etc. As a noun "I had 3 catches today"

Miss - opposite of a "catch" When TM does not notice a signal from Tommy that he has to eliminate, or when she is not available or when she does not take Tommy to the potty in a timely manner. This results in a noun, namely, "We had a miss just then."

Potty - This is a verb meaning to hold the baby over a receptacle for the purpose of catching elimination products. "Time to potty the baby."

Our progress so far for week one has been slower than Mommy had planned. Due to a post partum hemorrhage, TM is feeling pretty weak and is unable to hold Tommy for any length of time over a receptacle. You can read the birth story from Tommy's big sister's perspective over here.

So TM has been observing Tommy as she holds him, trying to recognize his signals for when he is about to pee or poop, as well as announcing to Tommy when he has just eliminated. TM states, rather matter-of-factly, "You pooped" or "You pee-peed."

What Mommy has seen so far is that just prior to pooping (which Tommy does nearly every time he nurses) he squirms, kicking his legs and grunting. This is usually accompanied by the skin on his eyelids and eyebrows getting red. Before urinating he usually cries and squirms as if he was in pain. He tends to pee after nursing and often sortly after having a diaper removed.

His umbilical cord is just hanging by a thread now and seems to cause some discomfort when touched, which would explain the crying at every diaper change. TM predicts the cord will be gone by morning, which will make everything easier as we can start using the cloth diapers and diaper belt.

TM caught one pee-pee yesterday in the big red mixing bowl. Today she caught another pee in the same bowl. After spending 30 minutes moving the bowl around on the bed to keep the toddlers from spilling it, TM managed to tip the bowl and dump the urine right between her own legs, soaking her undies and the bed spread. (TM is on bed rest while her body works to make new blood cells to replace the ones she lost through the hemorrhage. Therefore, the toddlers spend a lot of time up on the bed with Mommy, helping her and keeping her company).