Video Review: "Potty Whispering" by Laurie Boucke

In this post it was noted that Infant Potty Training: A Gentle and Primeval Method Adapted to Modern Living authoress Laurie Boucke had produced a DVD titled Potty Whispering: The Gentle Art of Infant Potty Training. Because TM is a big fan of The Dog Whisperer , Cesar Millan, and has read, enjoyed and gleaned much from Infant Potty Training, she assumed that this new DVD would be a good thing. (to borrow a term from Martha Stewart) She was not disappointed.

Tommy's Mommy shall attempt to describe the video to her readers in a manner that will accomplish two goals. The first is that her readers will gain a general understanding of the format and content of the video. The second goal is for this review to actually aid the reader in making an educated decision about whether purchasing this video is a wise and useful choice for a parent learning to communicate with her infant about elimination.

By the way, TM is not above making a shameless plug here about her activities as an Amazon Associate. If one her readers should elect to purchase the DVD from Amazon and uses the above link to navigate to Amazon, TM would get paid a commission from Amazon. Something like 10% . So far, TM has yet to make one cent from being an Amazon Associate, but she remains hopeful.

One of the first things noticed upon opening the DVD case is that it contains not one but actually two disks. The first disk contains the documentary. The second disk contains additional footage that was apparently shot in producing the documentary, but which had to be edited to usable bits and bites. This disk contains complete interviews with ECing families, doctors, psychologists, etc.

In analyzing the format of Potty Whispering, TM was at first tempted to think that it was horribly organized. Or perhaps not organized at all. But further reflection reminded her that she had very similar opinions about Laurie Boucke's book, Infant Potty Training. What follows is an attempt to get into the mind of Laurie Boucke and explain why the material in both her book and documentary video are indeed organized, even if TM would not have chosen the particular style of organization in sharing this material.

The problem for TM (or maybe it's a strength for TM and a problem for Mrs. Boucke) is that TM is a very logical and linear organizer. Her brain is sort of like a file cabinet where things are filed alphabetically, by category or in ordinal rank (1st, 2nd, 3rd, etc.) In Infant Potty Training and Potty Whispering, the content is sorted by category and the exact same content sometimes appears more than once, under different headings. Boucke does this for the benefit of people who don't want to read an entire book, but rather, want to quickly get information on a particular issue. If TM had written the book, she would have started at the beginning with "What is EC", and then moved on to "Why do it" and then "How to get started" and so on. But Boucke is not trying to give us her own personal story or even a "how to" manual necessarily. Instead she offers a compilation of research, resources and the personal experiences of others who have successfully used infant potty training in a variety of cultures and circumstances.

Here is an example of how TM would sort a big pile of fruit compared to how Boucke might do it. (It's just for fun... don't take this too seriously)

If faced with a huge basket of fruit and the command to "sort it", TM would just line it up from smallest to largest. The order would be completely objective. There would be no question about how each fruit would line up in relation to the other fruit. Boucke, on the other hand, would first arrange the fruit according to color. Then she would rearrange it into groups of fruits with edible seeds and fruits without edible seeds. Then into tree fruits, bush fruits and ground fruits. Then into those that have to be peeled and those that don't. In her world, the same fruit goes in several different piles, depending upon what you are looking for in a fruit. That is how she organized her book and video. Does that make sense?

So, now that format has been covered, the content comes into the spotlight, and here is where Boucke shines. Her expertise on this subject is probably unmatched by anyone else in the world. Not because she might be the most successful mother who ever practiced EC, but because she has done the most work to collect all the known data on the subject and to make it available to the average parent. Through interviews with researchers and her own narration she covers all the anthropological information, including data on how EC is practiced in non-western and primitive cultures. There is a discussion on the history of EC in western culture and how it is different from coercive forms of "early toilet training" as practiced earlier in the last century in the U.S. And, of course, there are the interviews with parents and videos of the cutest babies going pee pee and poo poo on cue.

There are modern experts like doctors and therapists explaining why EC is not the least bit harmful to babies and how the notion that children can't control their sphincters until 18 months or later has never been tested or verified and is a bunch of bunk. As a matter of fact, every day that "fact" is disproved by babies all over the planet, including right here in North America.

The second disk contains some interesting video and interviews. Particularly delightful is the story of Annabelle, a 14 month old girl that is toilet trained. The only thing her mother does is help her pull her panties up and down. The girl signs and verbalizes when she needs to pee or poo, she walks down the hall to the bathroom, does her business... everything. Another family testimony on disk two shows twin 18 month old girls who have two potties in several different rooms in their house so they never have to wait for access.

For those who have read Infant Potty Training, you will be glad to see a couple of the stars from that book, siblings by the names of Sarah and Beau. Not only is there video from when they were babies, but recent interviews with them, many years after they graduated from potty training. It is amusing to watch Sarah, watching herself for the first time as a baby on a TV interview show. She also comments on whether she would choose to practice EC with her own children someday.

There is footage of Boucke doing interviews on television. While TM hates to be critical of someone who has done so much to make the marvelous option of EC knowable to her, it is difficult not to notice that she tends to look quite frumpy on video. Her hair is stringy and unkempt looking. Nearly every woman seeing this will be silently thinking, "Wow. If I knew I was going to be on TV, I would at least comb my hair." This is no joke. It distracts from the beautiful message. Her voice is also boring and monotone. Perhaps she should have hired one of those British guys that narrate PBS nature documentaries. Don't you always come away after watching one of those feeling like a real smarty pants? I think it's the accent.

Another thing you should know is that much of video and photography is old. It was probably filmed with home video quality VHS cam-corders, without the benefit of proper lighting or studio sound. The narrator points this out at the beginning and is unapologetic about it. There is no need to apologize. Obviously she wasn't working with a Hollywood film studio budget and she's been at it for over a decade, maybe as long as two. The work needed to be made in spite of the lack of high quality production. Parents can't wait for someone rich to start from scratch using the latest technologies and a crew of hundreds to fan out all over the world to capture this story.

In spite of these limitations, the scope is far reaching. Experts from Europe, the U.S. and the far east have appearances in the film. The quality of the information presented doesn't suffer in the least for its lack of fancy, splashy presentation.

So, is this a valuable asset to the video library of an EC parent? Absolutely. If you need data to help you make a decision about EC or to defend your choice with well-meaning but nay-saying family and friends, you will find it here. Does your husband want to find out more about EC, but he doesn't have the time or inclination to read a stack of books? Let him watch this video.

TM's favorite thing about Potty Whispering is that nothing conveys the simplicity of EC like a few clips of babies being pottied by their parents. Much like an episode of the Dog Whisperer, where Cesar Millan changes the behavior of what was considered to be an incorrigible dog in about 8 seconds, Potty Whispering undoes years of incorrect thought about the awareness that an infant has about his elimination needs. He DOES know when he has to pee. He CAN communicate with his parents about it. He CAN hold it until he gets to the potty place. He CAN pee and poop on cue.